LGBTQIA in Media

Go With The Chaos

Me as a super cute...cat?

Everyone has a crazy amount of responsibilities (work, bills, relationships, family, and all the extras), close environment (people with same views or those who give mean glares), and the political environment around us (aka the longest Twilight Zone episode). In this episode, we* talk about ways to cope with the chaos as feminists in conservative areas or anywhere.

*We meaning my kitty (Jules), puppy (Dottie), wine, and I.

Has Your Voice Been Heard?

I give some info and a lot of rant about Planned Parenthood funding cuts and the possible repeal of ACA (aka Obamacare).

Find your U.S. Representive by zipcode with this link.
Find your U.S. Senator by state with this link.

Handmaid's Tale became
reality in Missouri capitol
May 3rd, 2017

Links:
https://www.plannedparenthood.org/learn/general-health-care
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/women-dressed-up-as-handmaids-to-defend-reproductive-rights-in-missouri_us_590a2417e4b02655f843a8fa

Fired Up!

Intelligent presenters. Policy engagement. Progressive discussion. That was the beginning of my night. It ended with missiles in Syria. I'm not a religious person, but this is one HECK of a sign to get involved...ASAP! Whether you're Democrat, Republican or anything in between, become aware! Know who your State Representative or Senator, the bills coming up (that are passionate to you), and make sure your voice is heard! 

Tonight I participated in a local initiative, Gov't 101, to become aware of who you can call and what bills will have effects on you. Right now, what ever craziness results from the current administration's choice (and it was a choice) will effect us all. 

Gov't 101 panel

Now time for a rant, why in the world was there an attack on another country?!?!?!? I understand, the gas attacks were heart breaking. Why not provide aid? Why not provide assistance to the child refugees? If I read one more time "they crossed a line" I'm going to puke. While millions of older people will no longer get their funded meals, we want to up our military (what a crazy coincidence, right?). Don't forget about the millions of people who will be losing their insurance, especially those who are diagnosed with substance use disorder and all mental illnesses (the new plans won't consider either within the same realm as medical illnesses). Suffering from panic attacks, need help with recovery from an addiction, or experiencing obsessive thoughts...please, go seek help now! Funding will be cut, it may not be this year, but the administration and the Republican led Congress have vowed to repeal and (after the election) wants to repeal it "with something bigger and better" (using Trump's vocabulary). 

I digress! So while our citizens our getting screwed over by this new beautiful budget the administration is playing hypocrite. In September 7th, 2013, Trump uses his now infamous twitter to call out Obama to not get involved in Syria, which he did not. Good thing government workers have some great insurance, because Trump may have some memory loss. Oh and another beautiful tweet from Trump back in the day. On September 5th, 2013, he appears to advocate not getting involved with Syria and "fix U.S.A." Could that statement be anymore hypocritical?!?! Before anyone says this is a heartless view, understand there could of been further initiatives to help children refugees, including aid and visas. How is firing missiles going to help the children still suffering in Syria? Please, explain the reasoning to me.

I'm sure there will be many more rants to come. To end on a positive note, even though I extremely disagree with the current administration and the choices being made, the fact I am able to write this blog shows our country has more freedom than most. Let's hope I'll be able to write this weekend with a kick off of WW3.

Have a great night!

Sincerely,

Hillbilly Feminist

Let's Get This Party Started and Have a Thoughtful Conversation

So it's definitely been a minute since I have posted anything. Good thing is I have more motivation to build on intersectional feminism and, of course, piss off trolls!


Recently I went to a student discussion of Intersectional Feminism at the university I attend, which was amazing! The best part was, instead of being surrounded by white middle class women, there was a great mix of people, also know as an intersectional group. I heard some women (and men!) talking about oppression I will never experience. It was eye opening. Many of the women at our table told experiences of being stereotyped in department stores. Because they were not white, they could not walk in the store without eyes on them at all times. WTF!?

The best part of the discussion was talking about the different types of oppression and how they overlap. I am a woman; experienced sexism. I was lower class as a child; some opportunities were missed, but learned independence and hard work. I was not followed in a department store. No one has ever flinched from seeing me (someone said this happens to them, WTF!?). I ask questions when I please in class and my voice is heard.

In one of my favorite podcasts, The Guilty Feminist, Deborah Frances-White explains white men are, for the most part, not shy to raise their hand to give their opinion or ask a question. In a group made up of women, white women tend to be the first person to raise their hand. With this in mind, I did not raise my hand once during the macro discussion. What I learned was even though my voice was not heard in the large room discussion, no one exploded or was tragically disadvantaged from not getting my point of view! I understood the theology of traditional feminism, the oppression of women. I am ignorant in understanding the oppression experienced by people of color (Black, Latino, Hispanic, Asian, Middle Eastern, etc.) and LGBT.

I am so excited to see what the 3rd wave of feminism brings to our society. Every voice deserves to be heard. If you keep hearing your voice or those who 100% agree with you, it's time to sit down and listen or learn to facilitate conversations with those ignored.

This was a short one, but bet your bottom dollar there will be more next weekend about intersectional feminism! Have a great week and remember it's okay to shut up every now and then!

Sincerely,
Hillbilly Feminist

Being a Feminist AND Engaged

When I first became engaged to my amazing man hunk, I had some major conflicts to settle within myself. First, would I change my name? Second, who am I going to piss off when I make my decision?

I, personally, enjoy the idea of changing my name. It won't be a new me, I'm already way too awesome to start that over. However, it will kick start a new chapter in my life. As expected, my mother, and the general feminist ideology, do not find the idea so pleasant. For the last six months, this battle has been rolling around my head.

In an article on Bustle by Bibi Deitz, the idea of changing your name can be seen as a feminist act. Changing my name is a choice that can only be decided by me. Who is going to the DMV? I am. Who is going to the Social Security office? I am. Who is changing their information with their employer? I am. The choice must be made before the actions. Although it may not align with most feminists' ideology concerning marriage, it is a personal choice that should be respected. Shaming each other won't do any good. If it is seen as wrong by someone, how does shaming help? Two wrongs do not make a right. ("Wrong" is relative in this statement.) 

One of my favorite values is respecting choices of others. It is no ones position to make up someones mind, and vice versa. This, however, creates a lot of conflict between the feminist I have grown into and the culture around me. 

The Ozarks is made up of mostly Scotch-Irish and German (on the northern parts). The idea of a woman being submissive, especially in public, has been bred in our culture for generations. (Even though I have plenty of stories from older generations about women being the dominate partner behind closed doors, concerning finances and discipline.) The perception of an obedient and quiet woman has been drooled over by men in every culture, ours just had isolation to allow that mentality to stay for as long as it has. (Native Americans were even wary of some parts of the Ozarks due to terrain.)

Although, in my mind, I know the practice is patriarchal and only enables the system to stay in place, I have been raised with the tradition a woman takes her forever love's name when she takes his hand. As much as I want to say "I would never do that" or "My name doesn't need to change to be in harmony with someone," my feelings don't align with those statements. I enjoy the idea of having my husband's last name for unity with future offspring, which is a super controversial statement.

Jill Filipovic wrote an article explaining if changing your surname was a valid reason for unity "make it the wife's." Many women are beginning to not change their surname. According to the New York Times in 2015, approximately 20 percent of women married around the time kept their surnames, higher than the 14 percent from the 1980s. From my personal experience, this revolution has not spread in the Ozarks, especially more rural areas. The majority of women I know that have recently gotten married has changed their surname to the husband's. 

Another idea is to reject using the phrase "maiden name," whether you change your name or not. Brita Long explain in her article "I Didn't Keep My Maiden Name" that although she did not change her name she refuses to refer to her last name as a "maiden name." She goes into detail about the history of the phrase and that even keeping your last name can still be degrading by referring to your last name being "unmarried" and "virgin."

As you have read, this is not the easiest decision to make. I'm sure people from with any of the opinions listed will have a few things to say to me along with a wagging finger. All I have to say is, I will respect your choices, so please respect mine.

As for my final verdict on what my surname will be...I guess we'll all find out in six months.

Have a wonderful week! 

Sincerely,

Hillbilly Feminist